[amarige]

Hi

I am new here and seeking advice on anger management ? My problem is I am permanently angry everything winds me up i get depression a lot and just dont seem able to rid myself of this lifelong curse. Has anybody got any suggestions please, i have tried to get to counselling to no avail been on the list for 3/4 years now. Just feel alone in this world even though i have two kid's. Don't like mixing with people and i'm alway's pressing the self destruct button in most aspects of my life. I am 31 years old and want to leave all this behind but cant get the help i need and dont seem capable of doing it on my own !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Benjamin Fry]

Anger is most usually the consequence of a reaction to fear. Depression is a reaction to overwhelming anger (the system is depressed until the anger is numbed). So it would be likely that you need to locate the source of your fear in order to short circuit your habitual angry reaction.

Specifically it is likely that you are unconsciously developing a relationship between the replaying of a previous fear held in your mind-body system by trauma and a consequent angry reaction which you unconsciously believe will save you from whatever it is that you fear. Anger is a tremendously useful survival tool. Your problem is that what you are trying to survive has become lost in time because it was suspended by your bodyís trauma mechanism.

Meditation is a great way to try to recover the subtle difference between anger and fear. If you can locate the fear, then perhaps you can begin to associate what experiences trigger it. This will give you a clue as to its origin and a head start on dealing with it in your present life. Tai Chi is also a good way to move this energy on in a constructive and meditative way.

In the end you need to find the place in your unconscious mind that is triggering these reactions and to become conscious of it. Psychotherapy can help with that, but with a little commitment you can achieve the same goals with any regular practice of a mind-body skill. Usually the more the merrier. Hope you find something that works for you.

[Delh2]

[Delh2]